u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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