I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
