I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Couch. On fire.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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