sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
