i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize