Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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