if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
