There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Princesses don't give blow jobs
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
