Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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