when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
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