Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
