He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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