Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
