i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
