I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize