Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
