I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
We are two peas in an std pod
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Success! We fucked roommates!
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