i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
