he shaved USA in his pubs
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize