Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
