Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
