Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
