I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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