I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
