oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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