thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize