I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize