IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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