Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
