no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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