I'm so fucking centered right now
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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