I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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