Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
