when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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