My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
