I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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