If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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