sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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