Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
