is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize