At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
