I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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