Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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