Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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