I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
