Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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