If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
