? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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