Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize