just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
