Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
