I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
