i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize